Toileting
Mastering the use of a toilet is different for every child. All children develop differently which means that some may be ahead of their peers and siblings, whilst others may take slightly longer – this is normal. Children with additional needs will have a variation of toileting and this is individual to each child.
When is the right time?
It is important that we don’t push children into this too early as this could have an impact on their emotions, confidence and in some cases could lead to more problems. We should wait until a child starts showing a readiness, interest or awareness of needing to use the toilet. See the information leaflets below for further advice.
Should you have any concerns or require further support around toileting, then please contact your Public Health Nurse or Child Development Practitioner via the Public Health Nursing Service.
Emotional responses
Some children may have a fear or anxiety around using toilets. This emotional response could be in relation to a previous incident, the environment, embarrassment or a social worry. Public toilets are not always pleasant and can often be harsh on our senses, some can be cold and echoey, some can be small with strong smells of cleaning products whilst other may appear nice but have a noisy hand dryer right next to the door. Some children may need gradual exposure and some desensitisation work around accessing bathroom environments which involves lots of reassurance and positive reinforcement. You can discuss this with your health visitor, school nurse or occupational therapist.
Constipation in children
Constipation in children is common, particularly when children are being potty trained around 2 to 3 years old.
Routine
Toileting can be seen as a routine or a process which requires specific steps. Sometimes, a picture process guide can be useful to display on the bathroom wall which gives simple step by step instructions for children to follow. This may include steps such as, "we close the door", "we pull our trousers and pants down", "we sit on the toilet", "we flush" and so on….. this can be created to your child’s current level of understanding and can involve more or less steps.
Pressure
A child should never be forced or pressured into using the toilet as this can reinforce any fear or resistance they have to accessing toileting facilities. As parents, we should always remain calm and communication should be clear, concise and positive. We should never make a child feel ashamed or bad for unsuccessful toilet attempts or wetting accidents.
Any reinforcement needs to be provided after the entire toileting routine is completed. Providing reinforcement following completion of each part of the routine may serve to interupt completion of the entire sequence.